Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Fawkes

In any narrative, I try to assess which role, if any, I would play. In the HP series, I most identified with/saw myself playing McGonagall, the smart, shrewd, strict headmistress with a soft heart and an ability to transform herself when she saw the need.

But there was always another character with whom I identified - it was just a role I never thought I could play...more on that in a minute...

Vivien Leigh once said Scorpios use themselves up and burn themselves out. Vivien played the first character with whom I ever identified - Scarlett was truly the start of my "game" - and that quote of hers always struck me. While not a Scorpio, I also use myself up and burn myself out. But what happens once someone burns themselves out? Sadly, I know the answer for poor Vivien, but that cannot be the answer for me.

I cannot be broken that way...

In any narrative, I try to assess which role, if any, I would play... and there was always a character with which I identified... a character who, even more than Dumbledore, filled me with peace, strength, and hope. It was just a role I never thought I could play.

But I've played a bird before...

And now I think it's time. I think it's time to try. For I have been burned out... but there is hope, power, redemption, and life among the ash...

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