Monday, November 12, 2012

Take A Walk With Me, Sissy

So...it's coming around again.

Your birthday.

22.

Today I wish you'd lived to be my age. And older still.

Take a walk with me, Sissy.

If I had any gift I could give, it'd be the peace that comes with discovering certain things. And that discovery process takes time. Time you were not given.

Sissy, you saw so much. And I am grateful. But it makes me sad you weren't granted the years of confusion and the subsequent, quiet revelations of "what it all means."

If I could tear it from my chest and leave it at your stone, I would.

It's the only peace I have, but I'd give it all to you.

I love you. That fact - like your life- never changes.

In fact, in a world of constant change, you remain ever the same. This brings me no comfort. I want you to change. I want you to grow. I want you to know.

Take a walk with me, Sissy.

Earlier this week, I had a chat with Cason. I couldn't love her more. It is not possible.

But as she changes, my heart aches. She hurts, but she grows. For you I want the same...

I know this isn't poetry. I've spoken more beautifully. And more intelligently.

But that's one of the thousands of things I've learned and would share with you. Eloquence...intelligence...they pale compared to sincerity.

Take a walk with me, Sissy.

Move with me. Walk with me. Grow before me.

And let me - for once - be the one to just lie still.

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